What's up MB1 family?
Quick thought: I want to start this blog post off by stating don't overthink who you are. So many people, myself included, will read these types of posts and then apply them to ourselves. That only adds to the complication of healing internally that we all need. So I strongly recommend instead of reading this in a 1st person voice, take a 2nd person viewpoint. I like to read these types of articles as though I'm going to help out my friend who is dealing with the issue. That way if I do see something I can fix that was mentioned in the article, I'm not applying the entire article to myself. We all have things we can work on. Just don't create more.
Also when I refer to a yes man this can also be a woman too. I believe in gender equality and so do the abusers of these situations.
Today's topic: Stopping the Yes Man movement; Yes-Man- is a weak person who always agrees with their political leader or superior at work. Dictionary.com
With that out of the way let's get into the meat and potatoes of quitting the yes-man lifestyle. This is something that I never realized until recently, I was raised to be. See in the south(Arkansas is close enough to the south) you're introduced to respect your elders, say yes mam/sir and no mam/sir, and always do as you're told by adults. To a degree, this is great parenting 101 stuff! The problem arises when you're told not to question authority and make sure you do whatever you can to make sure everyone likes you. The epitome of what it means to be a yes man.
Do you still live by this principle? well if so then, WAKE UP!
All this is doing is setting you up to get trampled on through life and lose a lot of people's respect for you, especially if you're a male! To make matters worse this mentality has left the South and is now spreading across the globe. A world full of yes (wo)men bowing down and allowing others to dictate every aspect of their lives. From the people that they love all the way to the career path, they go in. This issue is growing at an alarming rate. Today I will walk you through a couple of scenarios in which maybe you're falling victim to this issue and correct it before it's too late.
The worldly powers want and thrive on more yes men being around!
Why? Because they are easier to control and won't put up a fight for the things that are wrong with the world. With more yes men around the powerful can treat the masses however they see fit. They can control every narrative in order to keep themselves in a luxurious state of living while using all the worker ants at their disposal. Rich getting rich and the broken getting more brokener (Yes, I know that's not a word, RELAX).
Here's an example for you: You have a family that you love and care for tremendously and want to make sure they live the best life they can. Yet, when your job tells you to come in to work for the entire weekend during one of their birthdays, you justify doing it by saying oh we could use the extra money. Or if I just do this my boss will look at me in a brighter light and I'll get a promotion sooner than later. So you go and miss out on quality time with your family in order to please your job. Who at the end of the day, could care less about you or your family, and would fire and hire your replacement within the week. I've seen this happen all too often. It's a constantly growing phenomenon, work more enjoy less, why Yes (man).
It's time for you to take a stand or take a hike. You have to put yourself ahead of any job and realize that there are other companies out there willing to hire you and treat you better. Yep, you may have to leave you're hometown life behind, which I highly recommend anyway, but YOU and your family's joy takes precedence. Right now in 7 countries, 4-day workweeks have been implemented in order to get back a balance of work-life. These people that work this kind of schedule are able to not only spend more time with their family but with themselves. Loving on them. So why can't this be a thing in the States? Or better yet get a job online where you can spend more time at home. Either way choose you and your family over any job.
The Mario complex:
Being a yes man in relationships is very common, especially ones where there's a toxic role involved. Maybe one of the members is a narcissist or a dark empath who loves controlling the yes-man's emotions and head. Making the person feel that they aren't doing enough in the relationship to please them. Or they aren't good enough as a person to have them and they need to change their character to fit their perfect partner. Quick hint on the latter, you will never be a perfect person for them, nor will anyone else. Yet, the yes man goes out of their way to prove themselves over and over again to the abuser.
We will call this the Super Mario syndrome. It is based on the famous plumber who always risks his life to save Princess Peach. Who somehow always seems to get "kidnapped" by the evil/bad boy Bowser... You know the story that's as old as time, the good girl loves the bad boy but uses the good one or yes man to her advantage. It's literally portrayed over and over again throughout history. Not to mention the fact that Mario always saves the princess, yet he is still a broke Plummer... Collecting all the COINS around the palace so he can feel better about himself.
(Mario Voice) Oh nooooo!
This my people was me in the past, I was a thorough and true yes man in my past relationships, AKA SUCKA! Like I said previously I was raised to be this way and never realized it until recently after doing some inner digging within myself. I would literally jump at the thought of doing anything for the woman I was with in order to prove myself to them. Hardly ever getting that same energy reciprocated. I mean I drop off doing things I enjoyed doing in order to show them more attention. Constantly losing myself in the process... YIKES!
So how do you cut the cord on being a Mario in your relationships? You start by caring less about relationships! Once you don't care about being in one or looking for one then you're telling yourself I am priority number 1. I can go do as I please in the world and not have to answer to anyone. FREEDOOM!!!!
Then, when you feel it's time to date again, you start each relationship off by establishing boundaries. For example, let's say you're a bowler and you go with your group of friends bowling every Sunday afternoon. If the new person that you're dating keeps trying to insist that you go do stuff with them or they want to tag along during this time, then do yourself a favor and cut ties. They don't respect you and are trying to manipulate you into becoming a puppet. The most important part of cutting the Yes man mentality is putting yourself first in every relationship. At first, it will feel like you're being a top-notch A-hole, but let me tell you life gets a lot better.
Lastly, I want to wrap this thing up by saying, truly find time to love yourself DAILY! Even if it's 10 minutes, spend time doing what you want to do. God blessed us with this life to live it, not to struggle and bow down. I will say though there are times and places where you do have to respect authority, but make sure the respect is being given back. Let's gain our health back family.
Peace, love, and blessings! All praises go to my heavenly father God and Jesus Christ. I thank you every day for making me how you made me. Also, thank you for my family and friends as well. I love you, GOD!!!!